Party Planning

The Modern Bridesmaid: How to Be the BEST! 3 Simple Points to Remember

Are you a bridesmaid? Are you a bride?

Photo by Maria Lindsey on

In this post, I share some important things about these roles. If you’re a bridesmaid, you’ll want to pay attention! If you’re a bride, you may consider sharing this with your bridesmaids!

Weddings have changed tremendously. People are (thankfully) making their special days unique. Does this mean that tradition is out the window? Not necessarily. What does it mean for bridesmaids? It means that they need to keep these three simple points in mind when they accept the position.

Because I’m a lesbian with a mom who disowned me and a dad who acts like my relationship doesn’t exist, we had to plan our wedding on a tight budget. This was actually good for my bridesmaids because they weren’t expected to buy a crazy-expensive dress. We wanted a stock the bar party and a lingerie party, so they didn’t have to shed out cash for a major bachelorette party either.

However, some of our party still had their own ideas for how they wanted things to go (more info in video).

I’ve talked to brides who said that they were ready to throw their hands in the air and elope because their wedding party were driving them crazy.

As a DJ and wedding planner, unfortunately, I have seen weddings tear people apart. This is usually because brides and bridesmaids have different expectations.

In this video, I discuss how to (hopefully) prevent this from happening:

If you don’t want to risk your friendship, but you still want to celebrate the big day with your friends, be sure to do these three things:

  1. Communicate: Be more scared to lose your friend than to speak up or ask questions.
  2. Empathize: Put yourself in your friend’s shoes and do what you’d want her to do.
  3. Act Accordingly: Be there for your friend and have fun celebrating love!

Also, if you’re a bridesmaid, please practice empathy and realize that no matter how much you’re asked to do, the bride is doing much more. Plus, it’s her day!

Finally, be sure to do what the bride wants (within reason, of course). Wear the dress she picks, throw the party she wants, and support her. This is the key to being the best bridesmaid ever!!!

I love celebrations, especially when they are full of love, laughter, and joy! If you’d like my help making your wedding one for the books, check out my website here:


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